I had a 7.5 minute drive to school where I taught in Illinois. I could manage that just fine. Eventually, I could drive 10 minutes to take our children to their orthodontist appointment.
Once I retired, I almost never drove. When we moved to Hawaii almost 5 years ago, I stopped driving completely. About a year ago, the kids insisted I get back behind the wheel again. They were alarmed that I was too dependent which would be a problem if Art is ever not able to drive for any reason.
It was raining furiously this past Friday so an umbrella would probably not have sufficed for my walk to my Zumba class.
Art would have driven me, but I decided to take the "bull by the horns" and drive myself.
I know it sounds silly but it was really scary.
When I retired from teaching, one of my very good teacher friends, Carole wrote a song that the staff sang to me at the retirement party. The song is sung to the tune of MTA by the Kingston Trio. The refrain goes:
Was Art worried? No. Actually, he just found it all rather humorous. Well... I'm a bit stressed out right now. I'm going to take a nap.
Once I retired, I almost never drove. When we moved to Hawaii almost 5 years ago, I stopped driving completely. About a year ago, the kids insisted I get back behind the wheel again. They were alarmed that I was too dependent which would be a problem if Art is ever not able to drive for any reason.
Art would have driven me, but I decided to take the "bull by the horns" and drive myself.
I know it sounds silly but it was really scary.
When I retired from teaching, one of my very good teacher friends, Carole wrote a song that the staff sang to me at the retirement party. The song is sung to the tune of MTA by the Kingston Trio. The refrain goes:
"Oh, will she ever return?The final verse was:
No, she may never return..
Her future's still un-learned (What a pity!)
She may ride forever
'Round the streets of Chicago--
She's a driver, who doesn't left turn!"
"Yes, she'll come back--she'll surely return!And that was my problem. I got to Zumba OK, but decided to go home doing only right turns. I discovered to my chagrin that by doing so I drove three times farther than I intended! There was no good way to return home doing right turns only. I ended up having to do a U-turn and going back the way I came doing some left hand turns anyway.
...She'll come back-- she'll surely return!
She'll be back, but she'll never left turn!
Was Art worried? No. Actually, he just found it all rather humorous. Well... I'm a bit stressed out right now. I'm going to take a nap.
oh Kay, I hope you recover, if you don't want to drive don't do it, its not worth the stress,
ReplyDeleteI was a very phobic driver and a worse passenger. My biggest fears included left turns, bridges and expressways. Marrying Ron did not afford me such fears and now I am cured. It is a good thing because right now I am the primary driver. You are wise to take the bull by the horns so keep it up.
ReplyDeleteGood for you trying Kay and you got to Zumba!
ReplyDeleteI understand your reluctance, but they are right: you need to get over the fear of driving. I didn't have a car for many years in Colorado and got around on foot and by bike, mostly. I didn't drive and when I started again, it was very scary. But it wasn't long before I got over my fears. I think you will, too, Kay. :-)
ReplyDeleteGood for you for facing your fears! Ironically, by driving so much farther on the way home you got extra practice.
ReplyDeleteDriving is very stressful and not natural for us as humans. Many people feel as you do and get frightened. I could let my husband drive everywhere, but I know I must drive as often as I can. It is like public speaking. It gets easier with practice.
ReplyDeletea new challenge-keep working on it. Without a car or designated driver you are very limited...lol!
ReplyDeleteGood for you for doing something you are afraid of....hopefully if you keep it up your fears will subside.
ReplyDeleteI'm a little scared to get on the interstate again. I always avoid it when I can.
ReplyDeleteGood for you for at least trying! As for me, I hate to drive at night. Passing into the next lane at night really freaks me out. This means I cannot attend any club meetings at night. My loss!
ReplyDeleteIt always surprises me to hear about your driving phobia, because you are such an outgoing, together person.
ReplyDeleteKeep trying. My sister-in-law, who has a fear of flying, just took a trip to San Francisco and back, visited family, and worked on her phobia. She said it wasn't bad at all. She reported that it was a good thing that we are never too old to learn new things.
I enjoyed this post immensely. I drive once in a while to make sure I am not completely rusty. Last time I drove, David who was supposed to be navigating didn't. I took right turns until I found my way home. He said later, I told you to turn left. Dianne
ReplyDeleteGood for you getting out there, but during the rain like that, is really facing your fears!
ReplyDeleteWhen my girls were little traffic on the main street of our town was so bad that we did all our errands on Saturday and every stop had to be a right turn to the next and end with a traffic signal so we could turn and work our way back, right turns only. The girls had to plan the route to include any errands they needed, or what they wanted didn't happen. If I need to go out for several things I still find myself planning the trip in terms of right hand turns.
ReplyDeleteAt least you live on a small island, so there's no danger all those right turns will land you in, say, Alaska!
ReplyDeleteThe problem in Hawaii is that unlike Chicago which is like a North-South grid, Hawaii's roads squiggle, twist and do all kinds of turns. I think they're all left hand turns for me.
DeleteWell you did pick a rather nasty day to get back on the horse er-- car. I agree that you really should try to build your confidence. You never know when it might come in really handy, even necessary. Pick a nicer day next time.
ReplyDeleteLoved the song.
Kay -- As a brave teacher, I wouldn't imagine you didn't drive much. Something tells me a u-turn (was it legal?) might be more dangerous anywhere than a left turn. Yes, but just like kindergarden, you can turn left, you just need to wait your turn. Yes, Honolulu is bizarre for visitors. I don't think it was the traffic as much as not knowing where I could turn to get to my hotel, with several one-way streets. I had never seen a street that changed from one-way to a forced turn in the middle of the block. I restrained myself and didn't drive on the sidewalk! (In front of Princess Kahuliani Hotel.)
ReplyDeleteCome to Kansas. To stay sane, you will drive LOTS, here and there and everywhere, left and right, over and under highways, and behind smelly cattle trucks, and over skunks that don't move anymore.
Keep practicing when it's not raining so much. You could get a discount on your car insurance. Look up a "Driving after 55" class, both as a refresher and to get your discount!
Honk, honk, toodle on down the road! DrumMajor
Hmmmmm.... I think it was legal. It was in a residential area and nobody was around at the time to see me, which was good. And yes, traffic in Hawaii is bizarre.
DeleteKay, you need to take this seriously. I think driving is cognitive overload for a lot of us. If it gets much worse in my case, I am going to stop driving, even here where driving does not seem to be so demanding. Last night, going to a memorial service, I scraped the fender coming down the driveway then got confused and upset when I had a little trouble finding where I needed to go. And I needed gas, too, and was very worried until I had tanked up.
ReplyDeleteIf I have anything bothering me, or even if a have a passenger in the car, driving becomes very difficult for me.
I can depend on Terry, or I can take a cab. I think some cabbies will give bargain rates to regular customers.
For the time being I'm OK on my ordinary routes. But I did not drive until I was in my early 40's and am not seemingly "hard-wired" for it the way people who learned driving as teens are.
Oh... It is definitely cognitive OVERload! There's so MUCH traffic here, more than I had in Illinois. Art likes to have me next to him to give him another pair of eyes when he's driving.
DeleteAloha Kay!
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to thank you for stopping at my blog. It's been hectic so I haven't posted as often there. My daughter just presented us with another grand daughter, so we've been very busy entertaining the other grand children.
Welcome back to Hawaiʻi! I'll visit family and friends who are scattered throughout the US continent but Hawaiʻi will always be home.
Hopefully you'll continue to visit my blog and I'll have something new posted.
Aloha,
Wayna (aka CreativeGrammie)
Hello there! I always love meeting another blogger from Hawaii. :-) Congratulations on your new granddaughter. I'm so envious!
DeleteBut you have two cars! It never would have occurred to me that you didn't drive because of that fact. Terry and I have two cars because we both like to be gone at the same time to different places, but we have discussed going to just one car.
ReplyDeleteWe even discussed getting rid of both cars had we stayed in San Francisco because public transportation is wonderful and traffic is horrendous and parking costs a fortune there. Our studio apartment rent was $1820 and our parking fee for the garage underneath was $375 a month. It just didn't make sense to have a car there.
Fresno, though, is another story. Public transportation is almost nonexistent here unless you live on a main thoroughfare. We would have to walk two miles to catch a bus that would take us to another bus. so, we're keeping both cars for the time being.
We have two cars because we drive the Prius everywhere and keep the van for when we have guests or to haul lumber and other house renovation material.
DeleteWe have one car. My husband works at home, I'm retired, and we can go for two or three days without leaving the house.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm off to yoga now!
Left-hand turns into traffic are the single most dangerous maneuver on the road. My sister-in-law would do anything to avoid a left-hand turn. She would definitely go around the block, turning right, to avoid a left-hand turn. I told my daughter that later in this century, left-hand turns will become outmoded because of roundabouts, as in Europe, and left-hand signal arrows (which are a big relief). She laughed at me.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this, Hank. Actually... to be honest.... it's not just left hand turns but anywhere more than a 2 mile radius that unnerves me.
DeleteI'm back from my blogging break. Check out my post for today, you'll find it interesting.
ReplyDeleteKay, if I could surrender my driver's license today I would. I hate driving. When we moved here I thought the public transportation would be wonderful & I could live car free. Wrong, trains & city buses do not run on neighborhood streets. You have to walk or find a way to the bus & train stops. Walking isn't always easy for older people.
Welcome back, Linda! I'm so happy to see you again. I wish we had a better mass transit system in Hawaii.
DeleteI can totally understand how you are feeling. I have been a wonderful driver all my life. I have driven by myself all over the country through rain, snow, ice, sleet, or whatever else was coming at me. Then, after my fall last year, I could not drive. I didn't drive for six months. When I started driving again, I was an anxious mess. I kept at it by doing small trips to the store and etc. I refused to go back to being dependent on my husband. I am again driving distance, but not as confidently as I once did. I also limit my night driving. I totally get what you are saying. Congrats for hanging in there and driving to Zumba. Keep at it. Don't lose your confidence.
ReplyDeleteI have driving phobia too. It got worse over the years. Imagine, I even drove manual shift 20 years ago and loved it. Now I don't drive at all. I renew my driver's license just in case of an emergency where I need to drive my husband to the hospital. He's had two surgeries where I had to be the designated driver. It was hairy and I had to calm my nerves too when I got home. My husband always criticizes other drivers so that only makes me feel less confident. The traffic these days are a lot worse than 20 years ago I'm thinking.
ReplyDeleteL...w
I had to read your comment to my husband because he does the same thing which only makes me that much more fearful.
DeleteGood on ya, Kay, for going out to drive in the driving rain. I wish America had the system like we have in Israel, of dedicated left turn lanes with their own traffic light, and also roundabouts. I am happy not to have a car.
ReplyDeleteYou should live in Tokyo ... the public transportation system here is amazing!
ReplyDeleteNo need for a car.
By the way, did you get the email I sent?
I wish we could have the kind of transportation system you have in Japan here in the U.S. (especially in Hawaii since I live here now). That would be amazing!
DeleteThank you for letting me know about your e-mail. I couldn't see it in my Hotmail and checked in my junk mail box just now. I found a bunch of people who shouldn't have landed there. No idea why! THANK YOU so much!!! I shall post it for March 3rd! Perfect!