Last week we were saddened to see on the news, a video of a 6 year old Choctaw girl being wrenched from the home of the Pages, her foster family in California who had wanted to adopt her. They'd fought efforts under the federal Indian Child Welfare Act to place Lexi with relatives of her father, who is a Native American.
The news video highlighted the child being carried to a car crying and clutching a teddy bear while a group of people prayed, cried and sang from the house to the car.
The following morning, I happened to see an article about the sad case and read that there were other things that weren't reported on TV.
Apparently, Lexi has two other sisters in Utah. One is already living with the couple where she will be returned. Another sister lives down the street.
The law is written so that siblings should be kept together whenever possible.
The Utah family had traded messages and monthly visits for the past several years and has a good relationship with Lexi. Lexi had been placed with her foster parents when she was 17 months old with the understanding that she was not to be adopted. Despite a court order not to release a minor's name, the Pages had started a Facebook page called "Save Lexi".
Despite all the years of appeals and protests by the Pages, the court felt they "had not proven clear and convincing evidence that it was a certainty the child would suffer emotional harm by the transfer."
This reminds me of Solomon's decision where two mothers claimed that a baby was theirs.
What bothers me, however is the fact that the TV news only gave half the story slanting public sympathy toward the foster parents. That was not fair reporting and I was disappointed in the coverage.
It all goes to show that before we form an opinion, we should make sure we have all the facts.
The following morning, I happened to see an article about the sad case and read that there were other things that weren't reported on TV.
Apparently, Lexi has two other sisters in Utah. One is already living with the couple where she will be returned. Another sister lives down the street.
The law is written so that siblings should be kept together whenever possible.
The Utah family had traded messages and monthly visits for the past several years and has a good relationship with Lexi. Lexi had been placed with her foster parents when she was 17 months old with the understanding that she was not to be adopted. Despite a court order not to release a minor's name, the Pages had started a Facebook page called "Save Lexi".
Despite all the years of appeals and protests by the Pages, the court felt they "had not proven clear and convincing evidence that it was a certainty the child would suffer emotional harm by the transfer."
This reminds me of Solomon's decision where two mothers claimed that a baby was theirs.
What bothers me, however is the fact that the TV news only gave half the story slanting public sympathy toward the foster parents. That was not fair reporting and I was disappointed in the coverage.
It all goes to show that before we form an opinion, we should make sure we have all the facts.
That little girl is a native American and rightfully has to be with her kin, it is a law in the usa to make sure their tribes do not get separated..Why no Chocotaw family could not be found is something else, she should have never been placed in a family not of her own native race, none whatsoever..It goes to show you the authorities messed up big time no native American can be separated from their own tribe to make sure that she or he will be raised in their native culture...I cannot for the life of me understand how she was adopted by a family with no native blood whatsoever in their backgrounds..It is terrible for that little angel she will be haunted by it!
ReplyDeleteAfter six full years with her foster family she has bonded with them as her own! No one took into account that this will affect her all her days, oh, my goodness sakes..Are there not enough orphaned children in the USA for this people who were forced to relinquish this little angel back to a family? There certainly is, in every state many children languish praying for a forever home but no one adopts them they are not native American just American and in desperate need of a forever family..What is wrong with this picture, I say to the juvenile justice systems in all states get on the ball with adoptions for the many children languishing in foster care so they can have a real forever home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteActually, it wasntb 6 full years. She went to the foster home when she was 17,months old and the Pages have been fighting her return for a long time, tyimg it up in the court system.
Deletesad situation.
ReplyDeleteKay - I did read that she had visited with the Utah family regularly and that she was being placed with her siblings. I guess not all news services covered that part of the story.
ReplyDeleteI agree that news media often distort things to fit their own version of events. But in any event, if I had been with a loving family for that long, it would be very wrenching to leave them. She will be forever changed by these events, but it doesn't have to be for the worst. Maybe she will grow up and tell her story so that others who go through it can see a way out.
ReplyDeleteSo very sad. Of course the news and Internet never get it all right or out there the whole story. Frustrating for all concerned.
ReplyDeleteYou never get all of the news on TV. I use my morning news for weather and car crashes. :) Later I can access the BBC or the New York Times for a fuller version of the news. Stay cool there.
ReplyDeleteFacts? Get ALL the facts? Unfortunately most viewers are not like you, Kay.
ReplyDeleteIf you lived here in Israel you would go nuts from reading or watching all the misguided, misleading, one-sided, naive, and often false reporting concocted by the foreign media about events here.
It is so disheartening when you're trying to be an informed citizen. I don't know what the answer is but something needs to change.
ReplyDeletethese stories are heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteand good advice to get all the facts first Kay
DeleteHow interesting she has siblings she has freely visited often. Children are resilient if their needs are looked to (not the needs of self interested adults). I wish the child the best.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Kay. Thanks for the facts.
ReplyDeleteIt has nothing to do with evil intentions by media managers and everything to do with the nature of television. TV news consists of collections of sound bites, and therefore by its very nature cannot give viewers complete information on any particular story. You must go to print media (and they are becoming fewer and fewer) or do a fairly time-consuming search on the internet to have an in-depth understanding of most events. Unfortunately, many surveys show a majority of Americans get most of their news via TV, which is ill-equipped by serve as a news medium. Some years ago, when we lived in Utah, there was public controversy about Indian children being adopted by white Mormon families who would raise them as Mormons. I wonder if that sort of thing is a factor in this story that has not been revealed by any public reports.
ReplyDeleteI have relatives who foster and sign documents that they will not attempt to adopt the child. It is always heart wrenching to have to give up these children but most foster parents know what they are getting into. What you have reported makes this sound like a much happier ending than what television reported. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteWe rarely get the whole story and just have to remember there are more sides than we see or the media lets us see. Too bad they didn't do a follow up on the story. Thanks for the complete story.
ReplyDeleteThe rest of the story as I understand it was the mother gave up the child when the father was no where to be found. His sudden interest in the child is puzzling. I think the child should make the decision about where she is allowed to live. Adoptive parents should have rights too, and although the "parents" with whom Lexi lived we not her "legal" parents, the case was apparnetly based on her "Indian" heritage whatever that is as she is many things ethnically speaking. Sorry, my sympathies lay with the foster parents.
ReplyDeletePS. my cousin Phylis gave up a child born out of wedlock for adoption...the child was half Negro (this was the 1950s). Years later Phylis tried to reconnect with the girl. The girl did not consider Phylis her mother, she was much more attached to her adoptive parents. This is heart-wrenching, I know but the child should decide. In recent years, the child has let her children meet Phylis. Now in her 70s, Phylis never had any other children and her husband is dead.
You did well to search out the real story. None of these types of cases are ever easy. We have a similar one happening where I live right now.
ReplyDeleteYou're very right and I still don't think I have all the facts. I just hope it all goes well for little Lexi.
DeleteI don't watch the news or subscribe to newspapers. If I do want a peek at current events, I ask friends or occasionally follow blaring headlines in my junk email box from Huffington Post. However, I do not trust what they report as facts. Unfortunately the news media have become so focused on readership and sponsorship, they make up news rather than report a true story.
ReplyDeleteMurdoch's Fox News is the epitome of manipulative b.s. and I used to love how Jon Stewart would take them apart with humor and slam dunk proof and footage. Of course he also manipulated the news, but he and Colbert would openly admit that they were in comedy and entertainment. Sadly strange, some of what they would focus on was closer to the truth than "real" news agencies.
We had a similar sad case here on the west coast. It has not yet been resolved. My children are adopted and when they were little we always feared that someday a parent would show up looking for them.
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed, we should get all of the facts. Unfortunately that seldom happens and you really have to search to get the whole truth. It sort of sound to me like the foster family should have relinquished the child much sooner, and the change would have been less traumatic for all.
ReplyDeleteI saw that on the news and my immediate reaction was, "I wonder what the rest of the story might be." Of course it is heartbreaking, but your post is a good reminder not to jump to a place of judgement too quickly. I hope that the little girl will be able to move past the trauma of a media circus.
ReplyDeleteThank you for doing a better job than the press!
ReplyDeleteA sad, sad situation as a child was affected. I'm glad I was not the one making that decision.
ReplyDeleteFortunately, the TV news I heard did provide the whole story. The also reported the child is only 1 1/2% Choctaw Indian. Probably the fact she had siblings with whom she would be reunited influenced the decision on her placement. Perhaps what's unfortunate is that she was allowed to remain so many years with the foster parents, but think they're partly responsible for that by their legal actions though the years. Seems also that they may not have made her actual leaving a smooth transition as they might have. Whatever the full facts of the matter, the child bears the brunt of whatever emotional trauma she may feel from this experience. Certainly seems this could have been handled better for the child's sake which is who t's supposed to be about.
DeleteWow! I missed the 1.5 percentage Choctaw in Lexi. Sigh... There's so much to know in this case that it's hard to know what to believe.
DeleteSlanted reporting? Never heard of that before. :)
ReplyDeleteHope the kid has a good life.
We are always being jerked around by these sentimental stories. I think this is very bad, because it plays on our emotions and can confuse us to the point where we can't be rational about situations like this.
ReplyDeleteIt's a difficult decision.
ReplyDelete