Sometimes Life feels like a tightrope. We could be walking confidently, balancing everything in our lives, happily thinking we'll get to the other end without a problem.
Then suddenly, there's a wobble, you lose your footing and have to focus everything you have in you to find balance again.
We went to visit one of my favorite cousins the other day at the hospital. OK, all my cousins are my favorites, but Walt is my brilliant, always generous, kind, loving and fun cuz. He's made me laugh with his sometimes irreverent comments on my blog posts.
Several years ago, he had a bout with cancer, but it seemed that everything was removed and he was back to normal. He was watching his diet and doing all he could to maintain his health for his beautiful family.
He was a coffee connoisseur and used to roast his own beans which he would share with us. He'd tell us exactly where the beans came from, the temperature it was roasted at and the length of time he roasted it.
When we went to see him at the hospital, he looked better than I expected despite the fact that I knew cancer was ravaging his body. We are hopeful that chemo and radiation will work a miracle.
What really made an impression on me was his strength and courage. He smiled and laughed with us in an effort to cheer us as we were trying to cheer him somehow. He didn't try to hide anything, but he worked hard to smile for our benefit. Ganbatte is a Japanese word that means to persevere and to try your best. Walt is the epitome of that word.
I woke up the following morning remembering a dream I had. I was trying to stabilize a tower of blocks. No matter how hard I tried, the tower kept falling. Art came along and together we tried to attach velcro to the blocks to stick them together and make them stay up. I woke up before I found out if it worked.
Mom always told me that with Buddhism, I must understand that I cannot pray to change things. What will be, will be. What I can pray for is strength and peace. Well, I can pray for those things for Walt, but he seems to have more strength than I do.
I'm just going to try to balance my life now and do what we can to support Walt and his family, but if any of you can pray for a miracle, I'd sure appreciate it.
Then suddenly, there's a wobble, you lose your footing and have to focus everything you have in you to find balance again.
Several years ago, he had a bout with cancer, but it seemed that everything was removed and he was back to normal. He was watching his diet and doing all he could to maintain his health for his beautiful family.
He was a coffee connoisseur and used to roast his own beans which he would share with us. He'd tell us exactly where the beans came from, the temperature it was roasted at and the length of time he roasted it.
When we went to see him at the hospital, he looked better than I expected despite the fact that I knew cancer was ravaging his body. We are hopeful that chemo and radiation will work a miracle.
What really made an impression on me was his strength and courage. He smiled and laughed with us in an effort to cheer us as we were trying to cheer him somehow. He didn't try to hide anything, but he worked hard to smile for our benefit. Ganbatte is a Japanese word that means to persevere and to try your best. Walt is the epitome of that word.
I woke up the following morning remembering a dream I had. I was trying to stabilize a tower of blocks. No matter how hard I tried, the tower kept falling. Art came along and together we tried to attach velcro to the blocks to stick them together and make them stay up. I woke up before I found out if it worked.
Mom always told me that with Buddhism, I must understand that I cannot pray to change things. What will be, will be. What I can pray for is strength and peace. Well, I can pray for those things for Walt, but he seems to have more strength than I do.
I'm just going to try to balance my life now and do what we can to support Walt and his family, but if any of you can pray for a miracle, I'd sure appreciate it.
Prayers for Walt, his family, the doctors treating him and you.
ReplyDeleteWe know a terminal cancer patient that has an outstanding attitude.
ReplyDelete頑張って！Walt!
ReplyDeleteThose who have the attitude of joy and peace in the good fight as they near life's end are the ones I strive to be like. I guess in some ways I am a Buddhist.
ReplyDeleteWe've been managing cancer for 6 years now. We try to enjoy each day. Live in the present. I think JB has found the most reward from talking to friends who have cancer, and to just listen. It's tough.
ReplyDeleteWe avoid the language many use, battle imagery, and being 'brace'. We deal with it up front, and talk about it. It helps.
"Mom always told me that with Buddhism, I must understand that I cannot pray to change things. What will be, will be. What I can pray for is strength and peace."
ReplyDeleteI like that understanding with praying. I don't pray but I always thought it was stupid how Christians acted like praying actually did anything to change an outcome.
Pray for peace for all whatever the outcome...
ReplyDeleteI will be happy to pray for Walt!
ReplyDeleteYou have the right idea to support someone who is very ill. All the est to your cousin.
ReplyDeletePraying for your cousin Walt and for you and your family Kay. Ganbatte is a great word. It's how my own family tries to deal with life. Sending you love and virtual hugs too.
ReplyDeletePraying for Walt, his family and for you that peace fill your souls.
ReplyDeleteThis post is beautifully written, Kay. I feel you love and kindness in it. I hope for peace and comfort for your cousin and all those who love him.
ReplyDeleteWalt is in my thoughts and hopes for the best. Love from Joanne.
ReplyDeleteWalt's are special people, you know.
DeletePraying for your dear cousin, Walt.
ReplyDeleteI've never met a Walt that I didn't like. Your Walt, who roasts his own coffee beans, sounds like a very special person. Lifting him up in prayer.
ReplyDeleteUs older folks we are the survivors and I've realized that life can just throw you a loop when everything is going fine and dandy. I try - emphasis on try - to enjoy and love each day. Kinda hard while I deal with anxiety but I TRY. I am sorry for your cousin and family - may God heal and bless him and his. BB
ReplyDeleteYou have been brave to visit and be a good cousin for Walt. I will say some Episcopalian prayers for Walt and your family, too. Just being "present" in the moment is sometimes the best help.
ReplyDeleteAs an oncology nurse, I always found it interesting to see which patients would get through their cancer routine and enjoy more days without pain. Your Walt is one of the amazing folks. But it is darn unfair for cancers to "crop back up" in a different location, even years later. Remember to ask what he wants to do while he fights this chapter. He may want to taste some of his coffee, or sit on the beach. His team should be able to help him also.
Hugz, Linda in Kansas
Walt sounds like a wonderful person. While reading about his situation I want to kick myself for not writing a book about the many different options for cancer treatments. I have collected a slew of articles, documentaries and newsletters that I subscribed to after my husband passed from cancer. He went through the standard 3 of modern medicine - surgery, chemo, and radiation, for that was all that was offered. I know I sound bitter, but in my opinion, our doctors are blindfolded by drug companies and abetted by insurance companies and hospital policies.
ReplyDeleteSorry for the mini rant. I will send best wishes to you and cousin Walt. Miracles happen every day and in every moment. May Walt have a specially good one.
He sounds like a wonderful person, filled with love and optimism. I wish him the very best and hope for a miracle. Sending you lots of love, Kay.
ReplyDeleteI will keep you and your cousin in my prayers, praying for strength and guidance through this very difficult time.
ReplyDeleteWishing you all the best, Kay!
He sounds a wonderful person.
ReplyDeletePositive thoughts and prayers for Walt.
All the best Jan