One of the first questions you ask when you meet someone new in Hawaii is, "Where you grad?" (Translation: What high school did you graduate from?)
It doesn't matter if you graduated from Harvard. The important thing to know is which high school did you graduate from.
If you graduated from Waipahu as I did, the person will know I was probably an unsophisticated country girl from the sugar plantation. If you graduated from Radford, you might have been a military kid. If you graduated from McKinley, you're a hot shot city kid. If you graduated from Punahou, your parents were probably rich or had some kind of connection. Everybody here in Hawaii knows President Obama graduated from Punahou. (Art just said, "Wait, what about Honokaa?")
Once you know where a person graduated from high school, you can name the other people you know who graduated from that school and ask about siblings or other relatives.
I've had lots of occasions where someone has said something like, "Aren't you a Waipahu grad? What year? Did you know so and so's brother or sister?" And so it goes...
We were one of the last few classes that graduated from Waipahu High School before they built a new one down the street and turned the old one into a middle school.
I guess high school is important here because it is the last springboard from which everybody dives into the wider pool of their lives, often taking us outside the confines of small towns and possibly off the shores of our islands.
So... then... what do you ask when you meet a new person?
It doesn't matter if you graduated from Harvard. The important thing to know is which high school did you graduate from.
Once you know where a person graduated from high school, you can name the other people you know who graduated from that school and ask about siblings or other relatives.
I've had lots of occasions where someone has said something like, "Aren't you a Waipahu grad? What year? Did you know so and so's brother or sister?" And so it goes...
We were one of the last few classes that graduated from Waipahu High School before they built a new one down the street and turned the old one into a middle school.
I guess high school is important here because it is the last springboard from which everybody dives into the wider pool of their lives, often taking us outside the confines of small towns and possibly off the shores of our islands.
So... then... what do you ask when you meet a new person?
Hmmm. I'm not sure that I ask a question when meeting someone new. The questions start a little into the conversation. I like the "Where you grad?" Question, though, and can see why it's uppermost to those raised on an island. I guess "What part of Maine are you from?" Is a common question.
ReplyDeleteWell, since we've been on vacation people ask us where we're from, so that's what we have been doing lately. I've had at least one person respond to that and say, yes but where are YOU from? When I say Virginia they can tell I still have a British accent and then I tell them where I am from in the UK.
ReplyDeleteThat's interesting to know that you have high schools in various classes. My high school was for anybody, but in the Hague where our Royalty live there are some schools which are more or less secluded for the higher classes.. Actually I hate that, but... Our Universities are for everybody accessible . I always thought we had no class system like in the UK, but I was mistaken and noticed that when I married my husband. He was very kind and modest, but some of his relatives were different.
ReplyDeleteI have been thinking of you and your family in Japan. I do hope they are not in danger of being affected by the nuclear plant again.
Wil, ABCW Team
Thank you very much, Wil. Our family in Sendai and Tokyo should be fine. They haven't said anything... yet. The whole Fukushima area is so spooky.
DeleteI'm sorry to hear about that class system. That can be so painful and is wrong.
I have never heard that question asked. But then again, I grew up all over the country as a military brat, and I went to five different high schools before I graduated. It wasn't even relevant. When I meet someone for the first time, I usually ask where they are from or if they grew up here. We are a migrating and constantly moving bunch. :-)
ReplyDeleteThat's true. There's a lot more migrating on the mainland.
DeleteWe moved a bunch like Djan so that wouldn't be a question I would ask. Growing up mostly in Florida, a huge tourist state, "Where are you from" was common. Here, folks usually state "You from off?" Asked as a question that they all ready know the answer to. As the town is so small, had you come from here, they would all ready know you.
ReplyDeleteHmm, interesting. But as an Israeli when I saw Grad in your title I gave a little shudder. Here Grad is the (Russian) name of one of the rockets that are fired on us in the Negev (and lately also Eilat) from the Gaza Strip and from Sinai.
ReplyDeleteHere if I meet someone from Chicago, they will starting narrowing it down to which neighborhood and which high school. It is called "playing Jewish geography."
Jewish geography? I love it!
Deletethere were only three high schools that we all went to, one was for students wishing to enter the trades, one for the Arts and one for the Academics,, strange they were divided that way, so it wasn't class or social position it was your choice of occupation after graduation you used as your guide to which high school you chose.I have never heard of asking this question but it is very interesting, except I don't like to think people with more money went to different schools, thats not right, education should be equal to all.
ReplyDeleteI thought St. Louis was the only place that cared about high school!
ReplyDeleteIn addition to the public schools we have quite a few parochial (religious) and private schools. Asking where someone went to high school DOES tell you a lot about the person.
I have never been asked where I went to high school. Many will inquire about what college I attended. Usually the first question a stranger will ask is "Where are you from?". Ron could always come up with a genealogy question pertaining to their last name and know some link to their ancestry.
ReplyDeleteOops! He'd have a hard time with our last name. LOL
DeleteI asked where are you from, usually meaning where did you move from last...my high school is far away in California so I lost track of my many 440 graduating class. Went to one reunion and only the more popular kids cheerleaders, football players and student body officers were there...lol~!
ReplyDeleteThat is an interesting cultural lesson about Hawaii. I guess I usually ask about where someone is from and then I ask about their family.
ReplyDeleteIt isn't much different here in Ohio. Most people ask where you went to high school. I haven;t decided to be happy or sad -- my high school says I don't exist -- despite being in a lot of activities and a top student. Mostly I don't give a damn but I think whichever of snotty you-know-whats should be kicked of the committee. Yeah, like that would happen with those snobs.
ReplyDeleteWhat? You don't exist? That's crazy!
DeleteMost folks in the Midwest ask "Where are you from?," as in, what geographical area or city they were raised. Except while in high school, that doesn't seem as important as what city. Once the city is known, we may or may not chat about features of the town and places to visit. Due to the sports competition between colleges,"Where'd you go to school?," meaning college, is the usual conversation starter. Even if you didn't go to college, it helps to be aligned with one for chats about their sports, at least around here. DrumMajor
ReplyDeleteI agree. That's what it was like in Chicago. My kids both went to U of I. My daughter nearly went to the University of Kansas. We were all ready to buy Jayhawks t-shirts.
DeleteThe question asked most often when meeting someone new is "what do you do" as in a job which I dread being asked. But I truly love my work and find it satisfying so I guess that's what should count. In fact yesterday I realized how much I would miss work if we were to retire early at 62....the gig is too good to just stop. So we will downsize but not stop completely. I think the reason I enjoy our work so much is I like to change the frequency vibration of the property much like I would if I was an artist creating art. I didn't study art and probably couldn't make a living on my artwork but at least dolng our menial work I can.
ReplyDeleteL...W
So, what do you do? Especially since you like it so much you don't want to retire? It must be less stressful than some jobs.
DeleteResearch is now showing that the longer you stay at your job, the less likely it is that you'll get dementia and you can collect more social security. So go for it, especially if you enjoy it! Lucky you!
DeleteWe don't ask where people went to school or university, at least not on first acquaintance. Questions would be much more general, like, 'Do you know this place/restaurant/pub?' It's not quite, 'Do you come here often?' but not far off!
ReplyDeleteInteresting Kay!
ReplyDeleteHonokaa, where that? Green Dragon
ReplyDeleteVery funny, Art!
DeleteSo true - so Hawaii! I got here after HS,so Ina sense I remain malihini in a certain way after 26 years. But being a UH, Chalets Taxi grad saves me:-)
ReplyDeleteHonokaa rocks the Beeeeg Island! Woot woot!
Aloha rah rah
Like I told Hank, technically I've lived in Hawaii just a little longer than you have. Art is loving your Honokaa cheer!
DeleteBoyden's HS> LOL
ReplyDeleteI used to ask what folks did....like artist, writer, truck driver. Very insensitive of me.
High school? At our ages? Who really cares? Even college isn't asked about too much any more, but now and then I ask someone if they attended Fresno State, the local school. Now it's "where did you work?" "What did you do?" or maybe "What do you do in retirement?" Also, it's been over 40 years since I graduated from high school. Lots of water under the bridge. Even over it, for that matter.
ReplyDeleteWell... in Hawaii, high school is the starting point for figuring out who you are and who you know.
DeleteHere on the mainland the more apt question is "Where are you from?", or "Where did you grow up". Only those few who have been in the area all of their lives have relevancy in the high school question. There was only one high school in my small Oregon town.
ReplyDeleteI do have a friend who I used to work with who came from Hawaii, and eventually returned. She went to Punahou. Not only was her daddy rich, but she was a legacy kid, descended from early Hawaiians and missionaries.
That's what we asked in Chicago too. Yup, there were a lot of rich kids descended from those missionaries whose ancestors came to give religion and whose families ended up with a lot of the wealth.
Deletevery interesting
ReplyDeleteFirst I say, could you lend me ten dollars? Then I say,
ReplyDelete"I'm from Dobbs Ferry
Couldn't be prouder.
If you can't hear me
I yell a little louder.
I'M FROM DOBBS FERRY
COULDN'T BE PROUDER
IF YOU CAN'T HEAR ME
I YELL A LITTLE LOUDER.
Your sociological observations about Hawaii are 100% correct. Unfortunately, people like me are left out of the conversation, even if I've lived here for 35 years.
Technically, you've been here in Hawaii longer than I have since I left Hawaii when I was 23 and have been back about six years. Dobbs Ferry? You've come a long way, Hank.
DeleteReally...I try not to pry when I first meet someone, but high school seems a long time ago..
ReplyDeleteYou are so much fun!
ReplyDeleteUsually, I work with palliative clients.
I ask if they are behaving. If they say yes, I ask them why.
Where is the merit in behaving if you are palliative?!
This is exactly how it is in the town where we used to live. The first order of business is always about determining what high school one to.
ReplyDeleteLiving on Hawaii but not being from Hawaii, I ask if the person I'm meeting is a local...they usually aren't. Then I ask them where they're from. :)
ReplyDelete